Why am I doing this?

Because I’m scared. I’m scared of talking about my work. I’m scared of showing what I produce. I’m scared of sharing what I accomplish. I’m terrified of failure. I’m so terrified that I never start doing anything. I think and overthink but never do. The only time I would start doing something is when I know beforehand that the end result will be perfect. I’m so scared of practicing a new language I’m learning because I know I will make mistakes. I’m scared of coding an app for an idea I had because I’m scared I won’t be able to actually do it, and if I was able to, I’m scared no one would like it. I’m scared of starting to invest because what if I lost everything. I’m afraid to join an orchestra because what if the music they play is so hard. I’m afraid of trying a sport that I’ve always wanted to try because I’m scared I will suck at it. I can go on and on about things I only think about but never dare to start but that would require hundreds of pages.

So what is the solution? I’m not sure. All I know is I need to start doing something. Even if this something is writing a blog that no one would read. My hope is that it would break the wall of fear I have built around myself.

What I'm going to do is simply write about everything I do. I’m going to write about my work in cyber security. I’m going to write about my personal projects. I’m going to write about my personal development. I’m going to share my thoughts about random things such as books, music, movies, science, dogs, and video games. I hope this will help me break out of my shell, and improve my trust in myself. I also hope that if you are reading this it would also help you achieve anything you want to achieve. Because you can.